Seeking joy and meaning in a joyless mind and meaningless existence

Wednesday, January 2, 2013

It's A New Year, Bitches!

Time to take back control.  I've never liked clichés, but I've decided that I simply won't accept any more excuses or any more delays.  Granted it's only day two of the Great Turnaround, but I've sabotaged other attempts in a lot less than 48 hours.  It's the drinking that's going to be the thing, I think.  I had convinced myself that spending a night drinking and smoking with a nice computer game was the only pleasurable thing in my life.  I'm not exactly convinced otherwise, but I did get a good week and a half of vacation to dry out.  So that's gotta count for something.

Of course, every positive step demands a command performance of my "Anxieties on Parade."  Everything from deep-rooted paranoia to fears that I'm going to set my house on fire because I left my bathroom light on crowds the stage of my mind, singing and dancing a chorus of self-defeat.

Personal Roundup

Days Sober: 12
Weight: 262 pounds
Debt: $8,872